Quote# 138052

Why God Wants You to Stay in an Abusive Relationship

The natural follow up question to what we have just said about a woman and her children being able to free from a man who physically abuses them(by Biblical standards of course) is “What about non-physical abuse like emotional and verbal abuse? What recourse does a wife have in such situations?”

First I will fully agree that men can abuse their wives in non-physical and less extreme ways than what I have previously mentioned. A husband may not be a drug dealer who places his family’s life in jeopardy by his wicked lifestyle and he may not ever lay a hand on either his wife or children in a sinful manner. But perhaps he has a problem with anger and flying off the handle and saying hurtful things.

Maybe he has a problem with bitterness and taking that out on the family in various emotional or verbal ways. Maybe he is hyper critical toward his wife and children and never uplifts them. Maybe he even abuses his authority and gets off on power kicks and trying to humiliate his wife or children by various unreasonable demands. Maybe he isolates his family not for their protection but to project his power over them. There could be a myriad of ways that a husband either verbally or emotionally abuses his wife and children or he simply abuses his power to meet his own ego needs.

I also want to stop here for a second and make a very important point on this subject of abuse. Often times we center these discussions of domestic abuse on husbands and fathers but we forget that wives and moms can and do physically, verbally and emotionally abuse their husbands and children as well. Do wives or moms sometimes engage in hypercritical behavior toward their husbands or children? You bet they do. Do some wives or moms even punch, shove or engage in other forms of physical abuse toward their husbands or children? You bet they do. Do some wives play emotional games with their husbands and insult their manliness or sexual ability? You bet they do. Do some women push their husbands away sexually which is a form of emotional abuse toward men? Absolutely there are many women who engage in these behaviors.

Also children sometimes abuse their parents in various ways. Do children steal money from their parents? Yes they do. Do children despise and curse their parents? Yes they do. Do some children strike their parents? Yes they do. Do children reject their parent’s authority over them? This happens all the time in our day and age.

But let’s now return specifically to the subject of wives and children enduring emotional, verbal and other forms of abuse that are not the physical or life threatening types of abuse we have previously mentioned that would warrant outside intervention and in many cases divorce.

As I mentioned at the introduction of this article our modern culture has an attitude that we should never endure any kind of abuse from anyone whether it be someone who is our equal and especially from someone who is our authority. We are told to confront the person and then flee the relationship if the abuser does not repent and change their ways.

But when we read the Scriptures we see a very different view of how we should respond to abuse:

“18 Servants, be subject to your masters with all fear; not only to the good and gentle, but also to the froward. 19 For this is thankworthy, if a man for conscience toward God endure grief, suffering wrongfully.20 For what glory is it, if, when ye be buffeted for your faults, ye shall take it patiently? but if, when ye do well, and suffer for it, ye take it patiently, this is acceptable with God.

21 For even hereunto were ye called: because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that ye should follow his steps: 22 Who did no sin, neither was guile found in his mouth: 23 Who, when he was reviled, reviled not again; when he suffered, he threatened not; but committed himself to him that judgeth righteously: 24 Who his own self bare our sins in his own body on the tree, that we, being dead to sins, should live unto righteousness: by whose stripes ye were healed.”

I Peter 2:18-24 (KJV)


When we endure grief or suffer wrongly at the hands of others, in other words when we endure mistreatment which is abuse and take it patiently the Scriptures tell us “this is acceptable with God”. God is not excusing the actions of the abusers. But God is saying when we are on the receiving end of various kinds of abuse and we take it patiently that this is acceptable with God.

Such a thought is foreign to our thinking but the Scriptures tell us “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord” (Isaiah 55:8).

We often talk on this blog about how God likes to image or model things. Man was created to image God and thereby bring him glory (I Corinthians 11:7) and woman and by extension marriage was created to help man fully image God as a husband and father (I Corinthians 11:9, Ephesians 5:22-33). When it comes to this matter of suffering abuse – we, both men and women, actually model Christ when we suffer abuse from others taking it patiently as he did. And that is why God wants you to stay in an abusive relationship.

biblicalgenderroles, Biblical Gender Roles 16 Comments [6/13/2018 12:25:16 PM]
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Pharaoh Bastethotep

Why God Wants You to Stay in an Abusive Relationship

Then your vile god of evil can fuck off. Or, even better, may he imprisoned in his own hell forever!
Fortunately, he does not exist.

6/13/2018 12:27:48 PM

Zinnia

Well, at least he's not victim-blaming.

This isn't an improvement, though. "Let evil be evil, because preventing or escaping it is nearly as bad as evil itself." Either their version of God is the one which requires you to earn your way into heaven through suffering, or the one which requires you to earn your way with "true faith" and a world without suffering is one where true faith is scarce.

6/13/2018 1:03:06 PM

The Crimson Ghost

When you're reduced to making an "argument" like that, you might as well admit that you have no argument.

6/13/2018 1:10:02 PM

Citizen Justin

Despite what the Bible says about divorce, remarriage, beating your slaves and selling your daughters etc, the quoted passages from Peter obviously do not refer to marriage.

6/13/2018 1:30:11 PM

Skide

Well then, as our good Pharaoh said already: Fuck yer god and whatever that sick fuck wants.

6/13/2018 1:49:31 PM

Anon-e-moose

The divorce rate in the oh so religious 'Bible Belt' states being one in two kinda annihilates your entire 'argument', acertaingenderrollsupyourbuybullandshovesitupthearsesofabusivespouses..

And that is why your 'God' has no right to tell people - especially women - what to do. In Soviet secular democracies, 'God' obeys you. [/Roy Less]

6/13/2018 1:55:18 PM

DarkPhoenix


6/13/2018 2:20:02 PM



When we endure grief or suffer wrongly at the hands of others, in other words when we endure mistreatment which is abuse and take it patiently the Scriptures tell us “this is acceptable with God”. God is not excusing the actions of the abusers. But God is saying when we are on the receiving end of various kinds of abuse and we take it patiently that this is acceptable with God.

Then your God is immoral, and unworthy of worship.

6/13/2018 2:44:19 PM

Passerby

What's a shepherd's job again? To pull sheep closer to wolves?

Oh no, wait, it was the opposite of that.

If your God confuses the role of shepherd with that of a poacher you might want to rethink the metaphor. If your god is just plain evil they're not worth worshiping. The upside? They're not likely to be real. The downside? The evil is in you.

6/13/2018 2:46:21 PM

Dizzy Dream

If God wants you to stay in an abusive relationship then the shithead partner isn't the only thing you need to walk away from.

6/13/2018 3:48:09 PM

checkmate

And that is why God wants you to stay in an abusive relationship.


Brethren, let us pray:

Dear God, please convert this awful person into a small meek and defenceless female. Put him/her in an abusive relationship where a drunken husband beats the shit out of him/her every day, and twice on Sunday. After fives years convert him back into male and show him his above posting.

Dear God, we ask you this in the name of your beloved son and our Lord Jesus Christ.

Amen.

6/13/2018 3:51:21 PM

pyro

That's a lot of words to say "My Anti-Divorce Fundamentalism Is More Important Than Your Life. Fuck You."

6/13/2018 4:33:40 PM

KingOfRhye

I saw this one and mentioned it on the forums when this site down. Whoever submitted this now left out a few real "gems"...what they submitted isn't the worst of it, IMO.

According to these guys murder is wrong apparently ONLY because God says so, and they're BIG believers in the whole "the husband rules the household" thing. Even to the the point that they say "it is highly inappropriate for government or church officials to come into a home and give wives or children instructions on morality that are counter to the teachings of the husband who is the head of that home." Oh, and God says it's cool to beat your wife and/or kids, and to not allow your wife to have either money or a job.

And this one too:

As we previously established, the government has absolutely no right to add or take away from God’s moral law.


In other words, yay, theocracy!




6/13/2018 5:39:59 PM



If god wants anyone in an abusive relationship he is a sick fuck

6/13/2018 6:41:20 PM

Titania

That's nice. I'd like to lock you up with a cellmate who would abuse you, that's only fair.

6/15/2018 3:39:06 PM

Kanna

Yeah? Then let god tell me that, because I have no intention of taking the advice of someone who sounds like a wife-beater.

6/15/2018 6:22:23 PM

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