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Quote# 88795

The 5 horsemen are the good guys. The US is the 4th Christian superpower to rule the earth for Jesus. It was founded by George Washington who rode a pale horse. Our weapons bring hell and death.

interpreter, Christian Forums 47 Comments [8/7/2012 4:11:07 AM]
Fundie Index: 78
Submitted By: podkayne
WTF?! || meh
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#1431774
Leighton Buzzard

Smells a bit Edgar Allan to me.

8/7/2012 4:37:30 AM

#1431776
Hasher

Five horsemen? Promise me the fifth really is called Kaos a.k.a Ronnie Soak!

8/7/2012 4:40:01 AM

#1431780
checkmate

George Washington who rode a pale horse

Interesting argumetation. Sick, but interesting.

However, who said George Washington rode a pale horse? Is that historically documented or are you basing your conclusion on an artist's representation in a painting?

If the latter is the case, your argument just sank in the harbor. No further discussion needed.

Next crackpot please.

8/7/2012 4:55:20 AM

#1431789
Doubting Thomas

I'm curious. What were the other three Christian superpowers ruling the earth for Jesus?

8/7/2012 5:05:27 AM

#1431793
Mister Spak

"Our weapons bring hell and death. "

Because that's what Jesus would have done, if his kingdom was of this world.

8/7/2012 5:08:23 AM

#1431800
Dark_Lord_Prime

"It was founded by George Washington who rode a pale horse."

The US was founded by George Washington? All by his lonesome?

8/7/2012 5:13:06 AM

#1431804
Meishayuri

Interpreter's opium pipe is filled to the rim and he sees five horsemen. I guess the fifth one is the Lone Ranger?

8/7/2012 5:20:32 AM

#1431813
Kulgur

" What were the other three Christian superpowers ruling the earth for Jesus?"

I'm gonna guess
1. Roman Empire
2. Holy Roman Empire
3. Third Reich (it's in the name, after all)
Any other guesses?

8/7/2012 5:44:38 AM

#1431816
Kuno

@Hasher:

Five horsemen? Promise me the fifth really is called Kaos a.k.a Ronnie Soak!

Hehe, leave it to a fundie to confuse the Book of Revelation with a Discworld novel!

Off to the Apocralypse! (And always remember Rule One!)

8/7/2012 5:52:15 AM

#1431821
\m/>_<\m/

theology fail so hardcore it's heresy! way to go

8/7/2012 5:59:36 AM

#1431834
SpukiKitty

There's FOUR Horsemen & the OP sounds like a Poe. YEESH!

8/7/2012 6:24:59 AM

#1431836
SpukiKitty

NO! The Fifth Horse is the mount of WEIRD AL YANKOVIC!


OR...

ROGER WATERS!....

....He's his own horse!

8/7/2012 6:30:24 AM

#1431856
Horsefeathers

What the hell are you talking about?

8/7/2012 6:58:23 AM

#1431861
JohnTheAtheist

Kill the brown people!

8/7/2012 7:08:42 AM

#1431869
Darwin

"Our weapons bring hell and death."

Well, you got that part correct.

8/7/2012 7:31:48 AM

#1431875
John_in_Oz

Now I need an interpreter to explain the interpreter.

8/7/2012 8:03:29 AM

#1431878
Mayhem

"George Washington who rode a pale horse."

Ok, Martha wasn't the most comely woman, but that's being a little harsh."

8/7/2012 8:18:37 AM

#1431882
Thinking Allowed

This is a biblical fail of epic proportions.

8/7/2012 8:24:22 AM

#1431883
The Duelist

That would be the 4 Horsemen, dipshit. Funny how atheists know more about your own mythology than you do.

8/7/2012 8:26:28 AM

#1431888
Scorpius

Either that or the fifth horsemen is actually the God-Emporer of Mankind coming during the Terran Reunification Wars. And this is just a bit of really bad history the historians found.

8/7/2012 8:40:21 AM

#1431889
Anon-e-moose

"The 5 horsemen"

1- War: Kills people in battles.
2- Famine: Kills people via starvation.
3- Pestilence: Kills people via diseases.
4- Death: Just... kills people. Mainly via salmon mousse. [/"Monty Python's The Meaning of Life"]

5- Kevin: Doesn't actually kill people, he just gets on their tits.

X3

8/7/2012 8:43:55 AM

#1431924
Ludd

Well, at least you aren't insane. Oh wait, you totally are.

8/7/2012 10:30:39 AM

#1431930
Titania

@Thinking Allowed: or epic fail of (un)biblical proportions.

8/7/2012 11:01:15 AM

#1431941
Lotus-thing

...Equating a given nation with a harbinger of the apocalypse is not a compliment.

It may or may not be an accurate analogy, depending on the nation in question and what they're up to, but it is not a compliment. Ever.

Also where the hell are you getting a fifth rider from? Because I might actually read that fanfic.

8/7/2012 12:49:33 PM

#1431950
Seeker Lancer

Somebody left interpreter out of his padded room again.

8/7/2012 1:31:03 PM
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