And now for a hoedown.
Logged onto my facebook, just the other day.
Saw a friend of mine who I didn't know was gay.
I reacted in a fundie way that drew a lot of envy.
Now I'm demonizing women who look just like Drew Carey
Last two lines don't rhyme I know, but Carey doesn't lend it too well.
6/11/2012 3:58:31 AM
I have a gay friend on facebook. I didn't know he was gay until I read that he's interested in guys. After realizing the mistake, I shrugged my sholders and thought "So what?".
Her partner can't help the way she looks, stupid.
6/11/2012 4:41:55 AM
Maybe it was Drew Cary. You Moonfront Republicans are that dumb.
6/11/2012 4:43:20 AM
Surprisingly, not every woman considers your precious little feelings regarding how they look/dress! Shocking, I know.
6/11/2012 4:59:28 AM
Tricksy lesbians! Tricksy!
6/11/2012 5:18:27 AM
B... o... o... h... o... o.
6/11/2012 5:19:38 AM
How dare a woman not be aesthetically pleasing to you and worship your cock!
6/11/2012 5:24:15 AM
Fuck off you asshole.
6/11/2012 5:26:45 AM
I too have been fooled by lesbians. I have many lesbian friends and they have all tricked me into thinking they are perfectly normal people. Thanks for opening my eyes, Mattius.
6/11/2012 6:00:20 AM
My turn. *uses best Ryan Stiles impersonation*
Mattius had a friend of Facebook and he thought she was great
He went and invited her on a nice date
He took her in his room and learned something scary
It turns out the woman was really Drew Carey
6/11/2012 6:07:53 AM
"I can’t look at Drew Carey without seeing that disgusting beast of a woman now."
That is fucking hilarious!
"Hey, want to watch that new stand-up comedy special?"
"Yeah, sure. Why not?"
"Oh, look it's Drew Carey."
"Oh, god! The lesbians!(Blllaaargh!)"
6/11/2012 6:49:36 AM
Time to leave the Internet forever. It's not what you thought it was.
6/11/2012 6:53:33 AM
Oh no! Did they ruin your hot lesbian fantasy?? How dare they not look like the women in porn! What's next? Straight women who don't look like women in porn, either? Damn those lesbians, look what they started!
6/11/2012 7:14:18 AM
It's on you being that judgmental not her being "tricksy". And they're better off without you
6/11/2012 7:16:42 AM
Jackass. My bet is you hit up on her, thinking you had a chance, and then when she told you that she didn't swing that way, you got all pissy and embarrassed.
6/11/2012 7:17:42 AM
Do you want those lesbian porn tapes back now, Mattius?
6/11/2012 7:19:57 AM
Why are these people such mean spirited fuckhogs to anyone beneath their illusory standards of beauty?
6/11/2012 7:21:06 AM
If you're that shallow of a person then that lady is better off not being your friend.
6/11/2012 7:24:28 AM
If Mr. Maximus watched any slice-of-life anime, his head would explode.
6/11/2012 7:29:17 AM
Sounds like Mattius has a thing for Drew Carey. Poor guy, must suck living life wanting to suck dick and never having the opportunity to enjoy it for real outside little daydreams about dykes.
6/11/2012 9:10:32 AM
"I had a lesbian friend on facebook."
And she had a bigoted friend on Facebook... but since you deleted her, she doesn't any more... isn't that nice? :)
6/11/2012 9:30:30 AM
"and promptly deleted them from my friends list"
I'm sure this made their day.
6/11/2012 10:37:12 AM
6/11/2012 12:06:53 PM
I thought men could not be tricked. Of course you are one handsome man. *snicker* Too bad you didn't inhale your vomit and choke.
6/11/2012 12:16:17 PM
LOL, I know a fundy with a thing for Drew! Just admit it man, you like the bears. Also, Drew is skinny now. Sorry dude.
6/11/2012 12:42:34 PM