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Quote# 87133

I was taught about Darwin's Therory of evaluation. I think I fell for that. God straightened me out

LoveJesus24, Fresh Hope 57 Comments [4/28/2012 4:42:25 AM]
Fundie Index: 61
Submitted By: physalis17
WTF?! || meh
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#1397510
Old Viking

God straightened me out.

Not completely.

4/28/2012 12:05:17 PM

#1397520
Berny

If Jesus really existed, I'd have to ask him why his followers are so stupid.

4/28/2012 12:42:49 PM

#1397523
gaijinlaw

I was going to give him the benefit of the doubt and assume autocorrect but... "therory"?

Still a dummy either way.

4/28/2012 12:51:30 PM

#1397531
Skatepunk

You can't spell. You can't punctuate. You failed to do both in just three sentences. Why should we listen to what you have to say?

4/28/2012 1:36:45 PM

#1397534
whoanelly

God should also teach you how to spell.

4/28/2012 1:55:13 PM

#1397537
Agahnim

What's a therory? Something like Einstein's therory of Relation?

4/28/2012 1:58:37 PM

#1397543
Osiris



Behold Therory!

4/28/2012 2:04:30 PM

#1397548
aaa

Something tells me that you aren't exactly the sharpest mind of our times.

4/28/2012 2:08:20 PM

#1397549
Vince

Thanks for this. I needed a good laugh.

4/28/2012 2:09:58 PM

#1397556
farpadokly

Oh, I think I see your mistake. You were supposed to learn about Darwin's theory of EVOLUTION. Instead, you learned about some other guy called Darwin and his theory about evaluating things. No wonder God thinks you're a fool.

4/28/2012 2:31:14 PM

#1397564
Prager

Therory of evaluation? What the hell is that?

4/28/2012 2:53:19 PM

#1397580
The Duelist

Poe. If not, it shouldn't be allowed to breed.

4/28/2012 4:17:26 PM

#1397582
Professor Smartypants

Something tells me you didn't fall for the contraventions of English shelling either, ...

4/28/2012 4:29:08 PM

#1397593
John

God straightened me out

No, some imaginary voice in your head "straightened you out". Why would the Lord of the Universe, if He exists, waste His time giving you telepathic science lessons?

4/28/2012 5:39:07 PM

#1397609


Poe?

4/28/2012 10:40:36 PM

#1397616
Extraintrovert

@Osiris
You win. There's no way that could possibly be surpassed.

4/29/2012 2:35:24 AM

#1397622
breakerslion

Please elborate. I myself personly never got passed Louie Passtour's German Therory.

People say homskul is easy but its not. Hint. The right answer is Got Milk? Go figure!

Edit: @ Draken, below:

Wow. Typical cultist paranoia against anything that might compete against the strangle hold on their followers. It takes a whole new level of crazy to include books like "Yoga Stretch for Fitness." It does however, fit the basic Christian cult formula of, "everyone else is doing it wrong - and thereby of the devil!"

4/29/2012 4:10:57 AM

#1397623
Draken

You should see their amazing list of authors not to read. Hint: it's not only Darwin and Ehrman.

4/29/2012 4:13:00 AM

#1397695
SpukiKitty

@Draken

Egads! The folks at Fresh-Crap are against everybody...even some of the most respected stuff of Christian literary history: John of The Cross, St. Ignatius, Theresa of Avila, "The Cloud of Unknowing", Julian of Norwich, etc....

Some of the list I agree with, most of the list with the goofy Charismatic/Word-Faith/Dominionist/Televangelist stuff.

Let's see, this person does not like Charismatic/Pentecostal, Dominionism, Christian Mysticism, Roman Catholicism, Eastern Orthodoxy, Esoterica, Kabbalah, Sufism, Centering Prayer, Other Religions, Yoga, Meditation, Self-Help, Oprah Winfrey, "Chicken Soup For The Soul"....

I'd say this a very boring, traditional, fundie type you'd find in the backwoods or something. She doesn't seem to be fond of most theology/faith-based writings.

"Y'all kin keep yer reedin', rahtin' an edjukashun, all ah's needs is mah Bahble!"

4/29/2012 10:43:11 AM

#1397703
Renon

And I sutdyed geopology so I could help the enerdy companies harness unobtanium.

4/29/2012 11:10:43 AM

#1397752
The Dude Abides

I feel sorry for whoever taught you Darwin's theory of evolution, or at least tried to. Or spelling. Or pretty much anything.

4/29/2012 3:16:16 PM

#1397808
Giveitaday

I was taught about Darwin's Therory of evaluation

Let me guess... it was right after you were taught about Newton's Theory of Figs, right?

I think I fell for that.

Oh, I think you fell alright.... fell on you're fucking head.

God straightened me out

Doesn't appear to have helped you all that much.

4/30/2012 3:36:04 AM

#1397894
Mister Spak

Good,good. Now try Darwins Theory of evolution. That'll straighten you out.

4/30/2012 5:38:36 AM

#1397919
rebel

Me thinks someone should return to school...

4/30/2012 6:08:31 AM

#1398022
werewolf

Look, I had enough trouble trying to understand George Einstein's Therory of Special Relationships. It's all gone quantum, now.

4/30/2012 10:10:30 AM
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