Andy Schlafly #fundie

Andy Schlafly #fundie conservapedia.com

Quantum tunneling is the ability of particles to move through energy barriers even though ostensibly impossible based on traditional laws of mechanical physics. This was not discovered by scientists until the 20th century.

Jesus proved this was possible in John 20:26, when he appeared before the Apostles in a closed room with completely shut doors.

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old comment by Anon-e-moose

"Quantum tunneling is the ability of particles to move through energy barriers even though ostensibly impossible based on traditional laws of mechanical physics. This was not discovered by scientists until the 20th century.

Jesus proved this was possible in John 20:26, when he appeared before the Apostles in a closed room with completely shut doors."

So why doesn't the Bible explain this in the first place, with detailed diagrams, formulae & equations, hmmmmm?!

And no, 'because Scripture needed to be in an easily understandable form for most of the ignorant, illiterate peons out there' is not a credible (certainly justifiable) reason, Andy Schaftafly.

@Doubting Thomas

"Oh Andy, just stop it. You're looking more and more like the idiot you are when you try to use modern science to try to prove your ancient myths."

As David B says, we should indeed encourage him. So he can make himself look an even bigger twat than he already is.

The established right-wing Fundamentalist Christian clergy in the US will tear him a new one, when they get a load of his 'Conservative Bible', because as far as they're concerned, only the KJV already as is will do.

Especially keeping Revelation 22:18-19 in mind eh, Andy?

>:D

old comment by Anon

>>Mister Spak

Andy just proved he is even stupider than a FSTDT commenter thought he was.

http://www.fstdt.net/QuoteComment.aspx?QID=77490&Page=2#1227223 <<

When I made that comment, I was afraid that someone would find an example like this. In case anyone is wondering: the probability of a human being able to quantum tunnel through a normal wall is less than 10^-40 per try. If everyone in the world walked into a wall once per second for ten billion years, there would be less than a chance in a _trillion_ that one of the them would tunnel. I put more odds on a man with a key.

Has Schlafly ever given any indication that he is a troll, or if he is not, that he can ever accept that he is promoting both pseudoscience and bad religion?

old comment by Prayster

In Praise Of Madness

The darkness scattered by lurid light
The comet's tail is burning bright
Feverish dreams this night will fly
Let churning apparitions cross the sky.

My thanks, O Lord, your generous gift
Helps me further the widening rift
When soon a simpleton race we'll be
'Tis glory to lunacy divine, to Thee.

Please, our gibbering to remain
Our understanding be kept in rein
Beseech, let us continue to prey
On minorities and 'specially the gay.

Whatever the word, a special meaning
Goodness is bad, compassion demeaning
Talk is projection of stream of air
Mostly hot, and mostly unfair.

My psychopathy tends to violent themes
My bigotry springs from cunning memes
My naked madness, deranged for all to see
Thanks O Lord for the insanity that is Christianity.

Amen

old comment by Pastor Niceman

We all know that Jesus wants the atheist religion destroyed. The Lord has spoken and blasphemous terms such as chemistry, evolution, tolerance and compassion shall be punishable by stoning. It is good to speak biblical English. The grand biblical plan is to phase all languages out and replace them with Jesus's own English Holy Tongue. The miraculous workings of the human body may be learned during bible study classes, which shall dominate the school curriculum. The only true and chosen method of study to discover the true facts is called miracleology. Homos shall be put to death by stoning. Feminists shall be put to death by burying alive. Liberals shall be put to death by crucifying upside down. Atheists shall be put to death by burning. Non-whites shall be die in slavery by being worked to death. Non-fundamental cultists shall choose their own method of execution, as long as it be grisly.

Once only true Christians are left, we will work on finding new ways to distinguish one from the other, in order to continue the Holy persecution of people and thereby appeasing the mad God.

old comment by Anon-e-moose

@Angua

"So, Jesus is a subatomic particle then? Huh. I always thought that Jesus was strange.

You know, if you "interpret" something enough, you can get it to mean anything.

I could argue that oh, say, because anytime anyone looked at a Gorgon they were turned to stone or that Eurydice disappeared the moment that Orpheus looked back at her when leaving the underworld, that Greek mythology had predicted the Observer Effect.

It would be a bloody stupid argument. It would reveal that I know absolutely nothing about quantum mechanics. It would be completely absurd. But it wouldn't be any more absurd than half of what Andy says."

Andy Schaftafly had better not read "The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy" then, if he knows what's good for him. Specifically the part about the Bugblatter Beast of Traal.

Not even his security blankie (which I 'interpret' as his faith) would be sufficient.

'Hey, you sass that un-hoopy Andy Schaftafly? There's a fool who doesn't know where his towel is!'

And not even a towel will save him from something infinitely worse than a ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal: When his own insanity bites him on the arse - the levels of such could make the Heart of Gold's Infinite Improbability Drive give up it's own existence as a bad idea, and turn into a digital watch. Certainly when mainstream fundie Christian clergy get a load of the dingo's kidneys that is his Conservative Bible, and make him wish he was subjected to Vogon Poetry for eternity.

Now if you'll excuse me, I need a Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster and a lie-down. Andy Schaftafly's latest load of pre-verbal leg-removed Arcturian* Megadonkey manure is making my brain feel as if a couple of Hyper-intelligen Pan-Dimensional Beings have prepared, treated & diced it, then served on platinum platters at the Restaurant at the End of the Universe - whilst Disaster Area is playing a gig there.

*- Which of course, doesn't matter if it's male.

[/Aliens]

old comment by Anon-e-moose

@Iczer-four

"You Forgot Jr. from Read or Die TV who is Nancey's Son. he can phase thew walls like his mother."

Ah yes, how could I forget? Damn good series that, and worth a rewatch, methinks.

Yomiko (pbuh) would take one look at Andy Schaftafly and (before taking off her precious glasses; and not just because she is our Goddess Queen of Meganekkos!) facepalm at his intellect. Or lack of it. Yomiko Readman does eat, sleep & breathe books, after all. Knowledge is power - and not just her own superpower-like ability, neither.

Yomiko and her love of reading. A shining example to everyone who possesses a brain - and uses it. And books are the most priceless commodity of all.

old comment by Gloopy Joe

Did you know, that I can't wait for Andy Schlafly's comments to appear on FSTDT. Whenever his comments appear, I cheer. Because I know that millions of people around the globe will be put on the right path and educated beyond their wildest dreams by Andy's extraordinary insights.

Whenever I say that it would be a good thing if the enemies of Christianity could be taken down a peg or two, people shout me down and call me a moron. It's so unfair. It's not even as if I dribble all that much, most dribbling that does occur is when I'm masticating.

Yes, I'm not ashamed to admit it, I do believe we should destroy atheists and homosexuals. Just because I follow God why should I respect those that don't. I'm not making much sense now cause in my excitement you've caused me to have a drool attack. Moron my views lader, gurgle, gutgle , drool, gnash!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Andy Schlafly #fundie conservapedia.com

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