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So you don't believe in gravity? What do you thinking is holding you on the ground? Love? "
Why it's obvious, it's the FSM's noodly appendages. RAmen
3/17/2009 6:13:31 AM
3/17/2009 6:34:12 AM
At least we know why Jesus isn't healing amputees now - he is too busy making sure we all don't float away. :)
3/17/2009 6:38:18 AM
Jesus = gravity now?
3/17/2009 6:41:32 AM
Isaac should have picked the apple up and thrown it back at Jesus then?
3/17/2009 6:47:40 AM
The earth sucks there is no gravity.
3/17/2009 6:59:52 AM
Waitaminute -- these goobs are plagiarizing The Onion now?
3/17/2009 7:18:10 AM
I don't believe in fundies. I think they're all poe's (poeses? poesi?). No one can possibly believe any of those god stories. I mean, seriously...have you ever seen a catholic mass? You cannot tell me that anyone, not even (especially) the pedophile priest, believes any of that. Deep down in their hearts, each and every person professing some belief in a sky daddy, knows that it's not real. They're just too afraid to say it out loud.
3/17/2009 7:22:33 AM
If physics can only be as simple as your mind, maybe... just maybe you could be right.
3/17/2009 7:28:26 AM
There's a quote on the old site (FSTDT.com) that says there's no such thing as gravity, just the effects of sin weighing us and everything else down.
3/17/2009 7:51:57 AM
That's nice. Now, why don't you draw mommy something nice with your crayons?
3/17/2009 8:00:24 AM
this one, unified force is: His name is Jesus...
Well, that settles that, then, no need to look further, answers it all for me.
Paradigm. Hmm, ooh ooh, I know = 20¢
3/17/2009 8:14:46 AM
3/17/2009 8:24:10 AM
Jesus is the force that powers your wife's vibrator, the murderer's muscle and the sodomites hormones?
Well if you say so...
3/17/2009 8:56:47 AM
<insert Star Wars joke here>
3/17/2009 9:21:04 AM
POE or incredibly stupid?
It's actually hard to tell, there is really no distinction.
3/17/2009 9:26:37 AM
This is second only to that chump we had who tried to work string theory into a metaphor about fabrics.
3/17/2009 9:33:51 AM
There is a Chick tract, "Big Daddy", which says exactly that, that nuclear forces are a product of Jesus, so the post isn't that much of a Poe.
Either way, the dumbness...
3/17/2009 10:02:52 AM
Atheist in a foxhole
3/17/2009 10:20:37 AM
I declare Poe on this one since I read that in an onion article. -- God Is Real Etc.
Actually, I have heard this before. Some Fundies claim that a certain verse in Colossians (can't remember which one) implies that Jesus is the force keeping all matter in the universe together. The concept may have appeared in an Onion article, but there are Fundies who do believe this.
3/17/2009 10:26:21 AM
..."and so-called 'force of gravity'..."
Heretic! Everyone knows it's Intelligent Falling.
3/17/2009 10:31:22 AM
I'm afraid not.
3/17/2009 11:11:06 AM
But if gravity is the weight of sin, wouldn't it be the Satan force? Is the universal constant 666?
3/17/2009 11:26:59 AM
3/17/2009 11:43:47 AM
Physicists have known about electron bonds for quite some time now.
3/17/2009 11:47:30 AM
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