I have always been happy that my boys enjoy Legos, what a great toy, and never thought to even investigate any new item that they put out, we even ended up on the mailing list and now receive numerous catalogs.
One day I noticed them role playing with their beloved "bionicles" which I thought to be harmless robots, and heard them saying things that sounded just like they were playing with Pokemon (or close enough.) I immediately asked them (while my skin was crawling) where they were getting all those wild ideas from. "It's right here in the book, Mom!" Come to find out, these Bionicles have quite a story to tell, all spelled out in the Lego magazine in a comic strip format, which my boys had been devouring for weeks.
I was upset to find that I was so careless, I not only let that junk into my home, but encouraged it without even checking it out.
The story speaks of "..The Great Spirit Mata Nui descended from the skies like a burning star." "He walked the world and marveled at its beauty and watched over all living things." But he was followed by "..his brother, The Dark Spirit Makuta. Makuta coveted this world and all that his brother had." The "Dark Spirit" cast a spell that made "Mata Nui" fall asleep, now this world (sometimes referred to as an island) is in "Darkness" and in need of rescue. That is where the Bionicles come in, the have been sent by the "Great Beings" to save the world. And of course, these "mighty heroes" are to be equipped with "six Kanohi Masks of Power." "Each mask grants the wearer new power and wisdom."
The "Great Mask" list:
Miru - The great Mask of Levitation (to float and glide on air)
Hau - The Great Mask of Shielding
Kakama - The Great Mask of Speed
Kaukau - The Great Mask of Water (to breath under water)
Pakari - The Great Mask of Strength
Akaku - The Great Mask of X-Ray Vision
More masks are being added to this story, and I have not had enough time to research any further. Just annoyed that I didn't see it coming. My boys could make better use of their time.
What really gets me is that these "Bionicles" do not even require much effort to assemble - Lego is promoting new age role playing along with "dumbing down" what used to be an educational toy! (Now they also have a Harry Potter line!)
Warning to Parents: Do not rely on the past reputation of any toy company, check them out!
Robin, Kjos ministries 77 Comments
[8/12/2008 2:27:15 AM]
Fundie Index: 8
Submitted By: Kasumi
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What the Hell is up with Fundies are ruining the lives of children with their pompus bullshit? It's fucking lego why don't you swallow some then spout some more bullshit?
8/12/2008 2:30:20 AM
Yama the Space Fish
I wonder what would happen if one of his kids was caught with A Game Of You.
8/12/2008 2:34:15 AM
How dare your children have imaginations?
8/12/2008 2:35:14 AM
Um... yeah, Bionicles sound familair because I used to play with them. Besides that I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about. I always just ignored the official story and made up my own anyway.
8/12/2008 2:37:08 AM
Allegory for Jesus
Oh no! A cliche good vs. evil storyline and magic powers! Truly two steps away from Satan worship!
8/12/2008 2:37:29 AM
Legos are evil now? Why is it you people can't tell fiction from reality?
Someone tell me this is some sort of parody site...
8/12/2008 2:43:22 AM
wtf? is it 2001 again?
8/12/2008 2:44:11 AM
O NOES! NOT FICTION!
8/12/2008 2:54:15 AM
It looks like Kjos wants to usurp RR at the top of the dung heap.
8/12/2008 3:03:08 AM
Those buckle-hatted knuckleheads out from Plymouth back then didn't allow their lambs any toys either. By some accounts though, the kids had beer, so it might not have been that bad.
These modern Calvinists won't allow nuttin'!
Robin, are you giving birth to cows again?
8/12/2008 3:12:41 AM
Sit down, have a cup of decaf and a nap. That should relax you enough to get that big knot out of your knickers.
8/12/2008 3:16:11 AM
Well, I have to say that Legos use to be lot better in Good Old Days (™).
Now everything has its own special parts...
I used to love those technics (or what they were/are) but now they are almost fanished...
8/12/2008 3:17:00 AM
Oh, that sounds like fun! Now I want some.
8/12/2008 3:20:50 AM
mmm... not sure if i disagree with her, modern toylines are bullshit.
Then again roleplaying is nothing bad for childs so long as the child is not well... fucked up by say... the story of a born of a virgin jewish cosmic zombie that will come back to raise an army of zombies to make sure that everyone is saved from the metaphisical evil that we have in ourselves thanks to a rib-woman accepting a fruit from a talking snake....
I take it back, bionicles story doesn't sound like bullshit that much.....
8/12/2008 3:22:06 AM
A slight tangent, but this is actually the most informative thing I've ever seen on Bionicles. I remember seeing the ads and just being mystified. They were some short 30-second CGI productions with lots of shadow, fog and backlighting. There was a hint of what might be a story, ending with a deep "BIONICLE!"
It was years before I learned they're toys you assemble.
8/12/2008 3:26:57 AM
Fundie: "You sinning children will no longer play with teh demonik Legos! Sin! Sin! Repent! Sin! Repent! You want the baby jebus to love you, don't you? Well he won't, if you keep using your imaginations to learn and entertain yourselves!
Emotionally bankrupt child: "But mommy dearest, bride of teh christ, whatever shall we use to occupy our developing, eager young minds?"
Fundie: "Play with this stick. It is made of wood. The staff of Moses was also made of wood."
Neighbor: "Hey fundie! Why are you letting your progeny play with that phallic symbol?"
8/12/2008 3:31:16 AM
Be sure to buy Lewa for them, in all his glorious forms.
Lewa's a bad motherfucker.
8/12/2008 3:32:43 AM
You have got to be kidding me.
8/12/2008 3:51:00 AM
Damn. I was getting so good at determining posts from RR before seeing the source, and now you throw in Kjos to make it not quite as easy to tell.
8/12/2008 3:55:07 AM
I agree that past legos were better, I still remember the classic "Pirates, Castle, etc" where you had to make up your OWN story. Now they just steal whatever is the flavor of the week and make a series on it.
8/12/2008 3:58:58 AM
Oh FUCK you lady. I fucking loved Bionicles when I was younger. I have all the original Toa and the Toa Nuva in my cupboard right over there, and I had many fine hours assembling and reassembling them. You can go straight to Hell.
8/12/2008 4:06:25 AM
Bull. When I was a kid I watched Xena Pokemon, Yu-Gi-Oh, I even watched celebrity death match! Chyna was my idol. And for my 9th birthday my father bought me a Lara Croft action figure complete with machine gun and yet I turned out to be a perfectly sane person.
It's called a childhood. Let your kids have one.
8/12/2008 4:12:12 AM
RR Library: Total number of books in collection - 1
8/12/2008 4:19:46 AM
It's posts like this that make me realize I was a really lucky kid growing up.
8/12/2008 4:56:44 AM
Not paying attention much? The whole Bionicles/ Mask of Power is proudly displayed on the damn bottle/can thing they come in.
Hmm, I wonder which is worse, a lead filled toy from china or a "gasp" questionable storyline?
Nevermind... I've been here too long, I know, wall candy for everyone.
8/12/2008 5:04:45 AM
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