An advertising jingle is persecution now?

Be thankful that's the worst you have to put up with. Some aren't so lucky.

10/3/2007 12:08:23 PM

Ningen

It isnt Joyful Joyful We Adore Thee

It's Freude, schöner Götterfunken
Tochter aus Elysium,
Wir betreten feuertrunken,
Himmlische, dein Heiligtum!
Deine Zauber binden wieder
Was die Mode streng geteilt;
Alle Menschen werden Brüder,
Wo dein sanfter Flügel weilt.

Get it right, the song is German.

10/3/2007 12:38:35 PM

Caustic Gnostic

What the fuck?

Did these shitsuckers actually steal the Ode to Joy?

It is not your song, assholes. Give it back.

10/3/2007 1:15:36 PM

What?

They stole a tune then complained when someone stole it back?

10/3/2007 1:32:28 PM

GigaGuess

Oh sweet Jesus on a pogo stick GET OVER YOURSELVES! Are you that desperate for your persecution points, that ANYTHING other than people walking down the street chanting Gregorian chants is an assault on your beliefs wholesale? It's a commercial. Find something worthwhile to complain about. Over there. Waaaaaaay over there.

10/3/2007 3:31:48 PM

agentCDE

OH NOES SAMMICHES

10/3/2007 3:34:33 PM

Truth

God’s Simple Plan of Salvation

My Friend: I am asking you the most important question of life. Your joy or your sorrow for all eternity depends upon your answer. The question is: Are you saved? It is not a question of how good you are, nor if you are a church member, but are you saved? Are you sure you will go to Heaven when you die?

God says in order to go to Heaven, you must be born again. In John 3:7, Jesus said to Nicodemus, “Ye must be born again.”

In the Bible God gives us the plan of how to be born again which means to be saved. His plan is simple! You can be saved today. How?

First, my friend, you must realize you are a sinner. “For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God” (Romans 3:23).

Because you are a sinner, you are condemned to death. “For the wages [payment] of sin is death” (Romans 6:23). This includes eternal separation from God in Hell.

“ . . . it is appointed unto men once to die, but after this the judgment” (Hebrews 9:27).

But God loved you so much He gave His only begotten Son, Jesus, to bear your sin and die in your place. “ . . . He hath made Him [Jesus, Who knew no sin] to be sin for us . . . that we might be made the righteousness of God in Him” (2 Corinthians 5:21).

Jesus had to shed His blood and die. “For the life of the flesh is in the blood” (Lev. 17:11). “ . . . without shedding of blood is no remission [pardon]” (Hebrews 9:22).

“ . . . God commendeth His love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us” (Romans 5:Cool.

Although we cannot understand how, God said my sins and your sins were laid upon Jesus and He died in our place. He became our substitute. It is true. God cannot lie.

My friend, “God . . . commandeth all men everywhere to repent” (Acts 17:30). This repentance is a change of mind that agrees with God that one is a sinner, and also agrees with what Jesus did for us on the Cross.

In Acts 16:30-31, the Philippian jailer asked Paul and Silas: “ . . . ‘Sirs, what must I do to be saved?’ And they said, ‘Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and thou shalt be saved . . . .’ ”

Simply believe on Him as the one who bore your sin, died in your place, was buried, and whom God resurrected. His resurrection powerfully assures that the believer can claim everlasting life when Jesus is received as Savior.

“But as many as received Him, to them gave He power to become the sons of God, even to them that believe on His name” (John 1:12).

“For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.” (Romans 10:13).

Whosoever includes you. Shall be saved means not maybe, nor can, but shall be saved.

Surely, you realize you are a sinner. Right now, wherever you are, repenting, lift your heart to God in prayer.

In Luke 18:13, the sinner prayed: “God be merciful to me a sinner.” Just pray: “Oh God, I know I am a sinner. I believe Jesus was my substitute when He died on the Cross. I believe His shed blood, death, burial, and resurrection were for me. I now receive Him as my Savior. I thank You for the forgiveness of my sins, the gift of salvation and everlasting life, because of Your merciful grace. Amen.”

Just take God at His word and claim His salvation by faith. Believe, and you will be saved. No church, no lodge, no good works can save you. Remember, God does the saving. All of it!

God’s simple plan of salvation is: You are a sinner. Therefore, unless you believe on Jesus Who died in your place, you will spend eternity in Hell. If you believe on Him as your crucified, buried, and risen Savior, you receive forgiveness for all of your sins and His gift of eternal salvation by faith.

You say, “Surely, it cannot be that simple.” Yes, that simple! It is scriptural. It is God’s plan. My friend, believe on Jesus and receive Him as Savior today.

If His plan is not perfectly clear, read this tract over and over, without laying it down, until you understand it. Your soul is worth more than all the world.

“For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world and lose his own soul?” (Mark 8:36).

Be sure you are saved. If you lose your soul, you miss Heaven and lose all. Please! Let God save you this very moment.

God’s power will save you, keep you saved, and enable you to live a victorious Christian life. “There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, Who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it” (1 Corinthians 10:13).

Do not trust your feelings. They change. Stand on God’s promises. They never change. After you are saved, there are three things to practice daily for spiritual growth:

* Pray -- you talk to God.
* Read your Bible -- God talks to you.
* Witness -- you talk for God.

You should be baptized in obedience to the Lord Jesus Christ as a public testimony of your salvation, and then unite with a Bible-believing church without delay. “Be not thou therefore ashamed of the testimony of our Lord . . . .” (2 Timothy 1)

“Whosoever therefore shall confess [testify of] Me before men, him will I confess also before My Father which is in heaven” (Matthew 10:32).

For more information, please email --- wanttruth@gmail.com

10/3/2007 3:36:46 PM

Elle

'that ANYTHING other than people walking down the street chanting Gregorian chants is an assault on your beliefs wholesale?'

They'd probably find those an assault, too. We all know dat dem Gregorians were devil worshippers, ayep.

10/3/2007 3:39:35 PM

Dog's Best Friend

Oh, boohoohoo, we're so persecuted. Get over yourself.

@Truth: bugger off

10/3/2007 3:55:56 PM

Torquemada

::Drops Pants and Moons Trooth::

(_____________(_______________)

10/3/2007 4:04:04 PM

GigaGuess

@elle.

Yes, I forgot. How silly of me. Dem Catholics ain't TREW Christians.

10/3/2007 4:08:51 PM

DinDC

This is so stupid, where to begin:

Beethoven's completed the 9th in 1824. Lyrics:

Schiller - An die Freude (1785, incorporated into the 9th)
I.L. Peretz - Alle mentshn zaynen brider (ca 1880)
Henry van Dyke - Joyful, Joyful We Adore Thee (1907)
A Stupid Manwich Commercial (2007)

Not to mention the music is the EU's Anthem.

Gee, one would think they fuckin' own it. Persecution, my ass!

10/3/2007 5:28:22 PM

What the heck is wrong with these people.

5/14/2009 7:13:25 AM

Swedish Pagan

Ahaaaa! That is why they seek high and low for persecution. It is the first sign of the Rapture! I think your boat came and went during Roman times, when you were thrown to the lions.

Advert companies seek stuff we are familiar with and associate with positive things, to include in their commercials. It's as easy as that, no hidden agenda, they only want to sell more sandwiches.

5/14/2009 7:20:14 AM

lawl

This thread is more than a year old but I'm sad I never saw this commercial now, cos the idea of using the 9h to pitch mamwiches is amazing amazing amazing

10/1/2010 12:47:43 PM

Amadaun

Persecution? It's a sandwich commercial. SANDWICH COMMERCIAL. Sandwich. Commercial. No matter how much I say it it doesn't sound any less stupidly innocuous. And the music wasn't even composed for you.


Know something funny? With Truth there, I skimmed halfway through the post looking for the punch line before I realized it was real.

10/1/2010 1:07:08 PM

JohnTheAtheist

Obvioulsy manwiches are the spawn of Satan.

10/1/2010 1:15:15 PM