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#133830
Eris
Jesus was a woman?
1/6/2007 10:35:56 PM
#133840
Archangel_Lucifer
Yep
1/6/2007 10:47:41 PM
#133852
Pandus
I thought Jesus was an Asian hermaphrodite.
1/6/2007 10:58:27 PM
#133902
Witty Name Here
Since when can an ant effortlessly wipe out someone's entire family, kill all his livestock, and generally make his life a living hell?
1/6/2007 11:59:47 PM
#133914
FishyFred
Satan's HP is low! Hit him with Bible verses! Five hits should do it!
1/7/2007 12:08:51 AM
#133920
Hadanelith
WTF?
1/7/2007 12:12:49 AM
#133926
lynx
For the last time, Jeebus doesn't exist. His \"story\" that is mentioned in the New Testament is a complete plagiarism of the \"story\" of Dionysus, the son of Zeus, from Greek Mythology (which obviously never happened as well):
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dionysus- Scroll down the page and read the part \"Parallels with Christianity\"
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Criticism_of_Christianity-Scroll down the page and read \"Criticism of Christianity as Derivative\"
1/7/2007 12:16:42 AM
#133949
Adrian
satan means \"accuser\" or \"adversary\".......and he is the best at what he does........
Satan is Wolverine now? 0_o
1/7/2007 12:34:12 AM
#133959
CrowdingHell
OMG, Satan's coming! Hurry, throw five hundred ellipses at him, and he'll run away!
(BTW, jmak, you only need three dots. You know, 'cause Satan's just an ant, and he can't see all seven at once.)
1/7/2007 12:46:41 AM
#133991
Papabear
Why are you nuts so afraid of Satan when you believe that by speaking the name of Jesus or quoting Bible verses you can defeat him?
1/7/2007 1:06:47 AM
#134006
Goetian
Why are you nuts so afraid of Satan when you believe that by speaking the name of Jesus or quoting Bible verses you can defeat him?
Hint: they don't really believe it. Based on my extensive contact with the \"spiritual warfare\" brand of fundie, they only rant about how weak Satan is because they're trying to convince themselves.
...Which is why it's such utterly malicious fun to make them think you've set demons after them. They will be TERRIFIED and start freaking out, right in front of you. Grab some popcorn and watch the show.
1/7/2007 1:19:23 AM
#134014
Julian
Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa?
And I think you're confusing mythical Satan with mythical vampires - they don't like bible verses. Half the babble's about Satan, he'd probably love a reading.
1/7/2007 1:26:30 AM
#134047
Traitor1
Jesus did not hurl 5 bible verses...you fail
1/7/2007 2:16:19 AM
#134051
Norb Bippus
5 verses? What about 4 verses and 1 old-wives tale? Or how about a 2 verses, a cliche, and another 2 things that sound vaguely bible-ish? I just want to be sure next time satan comes by, I don't want to be caught off guard.
1/7/2007 2:25:10 AM
#134104
Mary Sunshine
Or four calling birds, three french hens, two turtle doves and a partridge in a pear tree?
1/7/2007 4:42:31 AM
#134108
Coffee
I don't think it's the non-believers who are confused when you tell us that christians are giants, satan is an ant, and Jebus was a girl. I think those are some mighty potent mushrooms you've been adding to your diet.
1/7/2007 4:50:47 AM
#134173
Boy
This seems suspiciously heretical. This is suggesting that the sheer power of our belief is what strengthens or weakens Christ/God/Satan whathaveyou. While I don't personally see anything more weird about that idea, it's pretty un-Christian, isn't it? Is God all-powerful, or innit?
1/7/2007 9:26:14 AM
#134176
Matilde
This guy is a troll. If he ins´t, he is really insane.
1/7/2007 9:29:14 AM
#134294
Jezebel's Evil Sister
Why would quoting 5 bible verses have any effect on Satan, other than, perhaps, boring him? Don't you fundies claim that the old debbil is an expert quoter of scripture, or some such rot?
1/7/2007 5:13:43 PM
#134428
Old Viking
Where can I buy five Bible verses? What should I carry them in? Must I have them with me all the time?
1/7/2007 10:29:42 PM
#134597
D Laurier
jmak? the same jmak who spewed idiocys on yahoo chat?
the arch troll of the atheists rooms on yahoo?
1/8/2007 5:04:22 AM
#134644
Thursday
This actually works! Really!
If by \"Satan\" you mean \"Ms. Klobstock down the street\" and by \"Bible verses\" you mean \"lumps of bear scat\"!
1/8/2007 6:53:08 AM
#134671
BurntBush
\"You Go Girl!!!!\"
Gay for Jesus?
1/8/2007 8:48:45 AM
#134724
Consensus
sicko xians writin WEIRD msgs on da intraweb is to be taken SRIOUSLY, eh?
1/8/2007 11:11:44 AM
#135034
Niali
Witty Name: If you're referring to Job, that was actually God. He basically made a bet with Satan that He (God) could take away everything Job had, and Job still wouldn't renounce him.
I read the \"You Go Girl\" to mean he's addressing a female, not actually referring to Jesus there. The fault is in the punctuation.
This is really clumsy, terrible writing, but I don't really see anything wrong with the content except that he's really way too excited. But hey, it's a pep talk, so maybe that's alright.
1/8/2007 7:33:51 PM
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