I was approaching a red light that turned green when I was close enough that an asshole driver would have made a left as the opposing traffic started to move, forcing them to yield. The intersection is 5 lanes wide. 2 lanes each direction for straight or right turns, the center lane for lefts only. The opposing lanes (east) had traffic in the left and center lane. The curb lane was clear. I was stopped, facing west in the left turn lane.

As I stopped I noticed a buck and a niggopotamus shucking and jiving across the lanes doing the usual slow nigger shuffle. No doubt the other drivers who now had to wait were pondering joining niggermania. The buck cleared the road and was on the sidewalk while Shaniqua was still waddling across. It was still traversing the middle eastbound lane and stepped in the curb lane without looking. It was obvious that they'd ignored the pedestrian crossing signal as they were in the roadway when the light turned red.

As Shaniqua cleared the center lane, it never looked for clearance in the final curb lane. I was watching it as a car came in to my view through the open lane. The other driver apparently saw the massive blob of EBT induced lipids and broke hard, bringing the vehicle to a screeching halt about a foot from the disgusting sow.

It started chimping out. I could see it howling and flailing its arms. The buck was standing on the sidewalk, laughing. The driver attempted to go around the obstruction as it was taking a picture of the license plate with its obongo phone. When the car made the orbit around Shaniqua, it swung it's paw at the car. I couldn't see if it made coontact as it was on the other side of the vehicle. The other filthy animal was still laughing at its mate's primitive antics.

Close call but I almost had an amusing bedtime story to tell. From a front row seat, as well.