I wish there were a legit and open forum for "incels" to support one another and work on themselves.
The sub/r assholes we discuss here just sit around in a sad panda circle-jerk bitching about how vile women are while at the same time obsessed with their own apparent desire to date and marry WOMEN! The problem with some of those posters is just they're so fucking gross on the inside I can smell the defeatism and moral decay from here - which means women anywhere near them won't get the genuine "nice guy" vibe; they'll get the "desperate raper/stalker/serial-killer-with-body-parts-in-his-freezer" vibe.
I genuinely wish sexual surrogacy would be far more openly permitted, advertised, and practiced without judgement being aimed at either the surrogate or the seeker. Surrogates are more than just pricey prostitutes. The good ones are trained in psychology and recognise their job may be to guide someone who craves intimacy and doesn't know how to get or give sexual affection.
And I actually do think healthcare benefits should cover legit sexual surrogacy.
Anyway, naming yourself "iamhopeless," as the OP did, is self-defeating. Forget most PUA or game, but they do make one point "iamhopeless" should take to heart: Others are more likely to have confidence in you if you're confident.
Confidence isn't swaggering bravado (although too many men and women alike think these things are the same).
Nope. Confidence is having what you trust to be a core of personal integrity you're certain you'll never sell or allow to dissipate. Rejection, hurt or humiliate as it may, doesn't do long-term damage to someone with that kind of confidence.
THAT is likely what you're seeing in action when a heavyset neckbeard is draped in women. And yes, that does happen.
What you're seeing in action when "Chad" gets the girl is almost always immaturity among all involved. (Note how most self-identified incels seem to be in their early 20s.)
I think these incels should save up for an older escort who does the whole "girlfriend experience" thing. They learn. They get sex. Everyone wins.
All the idiotic misogyny of that sub aside - let's just ignore all that for a moment - there's a pervasive attitude of entitlement among many of their posters.
PROTIP: That's a turn-off.