The Secular Humanist Afterlife

Secular humanism comes up short as a religion because its beginning is unconvincing and its ending unappealing.

"In the beginning was the Bib Bang, and for no reason at all everything just started up, and by pure chance, non-living dust and chemicals came alive and finally evolved into Hillary Clinton..." That's somewhat less inspiring, and falls far short of St. John's "In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God..."

But the end of humanist theology is worse than the beginning: you just die, fizzle out, kaput, that's it. So if you had a hard life, too bad. There's no God to give you justice, no God to show you mercy, no Heavenly Father to bind up your wounds and wipe away your tears.

In between the iffy beginning and the worms'-meat ending, humanists have worked hard to fill up their religion's middle.

They have their holy scriptures, written by Marx and Darwin and Freud et al, which may not be disbelieved. They have several orders of priesthood-scientists, academics, public school teachers, feminists, homosexuals, and progressive politicians, whose word is law. They have an awesome idol - the ever-expanding, all-devouring, freedom-eating, wealth-consuming State, whose destiny it is to rule the world. And in Global Warming they have their own End Times scenario.

They have their own sacraments, including human sacrifice. Abortion: "I now consider abortion to be a major blessing, and to be a sacrament in the hands of women," as one feminist put it. You can even have Native American flute music with your abortion - how cool is that?